Why yes, I still exist, thank you very much.
Um…sorry about not writing for awhile. The schoolyear is much busier than the summer, so I need to figure out the part(s) of the week most conducive to this. It may be that I just can’t really write more than a handful of times a month (if that).
I’ve been thinking a lot lately about the way that we handle our emotions, so I’m about to turn into an amateur psychologist for the remainder of this post. Sorry.
This basically all boils down to the fact that I think that the social construct that we should hide our emotions–especially the idea that males should hide their emotions–is more than a little silly. A form of self-preservation, maybe, but a silly one, I feel.
For example, why is it that so many males have a hard time saying “I love you,” or crying? This bugs me to no end. It really makes you more manly to suppress emotions? Huh?
It may make you more “manly” by arbitrary social standards, but isn’t it less genuine?
There are definitely times where you do not want to cry, I suppose–we don’t all want to turn into blubbery messes. But if something makes you truly sad, or joyful, or any other emotion that might lead to crying, please remind me why you are supposed to suppress that. So the people around you don’t see your “flaws”?
Same with saying “I love you.” There’s no need to stand on the mountaintops and scream about your affection for all your friends, but really, would it kill you just to say it? Saying “I love you” to someone of the opposite gender does not mean that you want to pursue a relationship greater than friendship. Really (*newsflash*), you can love your friends (and tell them so) regardless of their gender. Or your gender, for that matter. It doesn’t imply physical attraction to them. Besides, when you hug them, aren’t you really saying “I love you” without using words?
On a less important note, why do we have to keep our crushes secret like it’s junior high? Fear of rejection? Really? We’re not past that? I mean, no one likes to get turned down, but in some cases, isn’t keeping a crush a secret just delaying the inevitable? What’s the harm in saying,
“Hey, I think I like you. You’re _________________(insert positive character traits you see in said crush here), and I think we should hang out more. I understand you might not feel the same way, and I don’t mean for this to ruin our friendship; sorry if it does. You’re not stupid, you probably had an inkling…”?
I am of course guilty of this last one, too, and I also see that sometimes, a person doesn’t want to come across like a fool–these things are rarely as black-and-white as we like to think, so this is less important, and thus later in the entry. It’s really just theoretical, but I feel there are situations in which it would be beneficial/the right thing to do to say this.
I’ll get off the soapbox now. I’m curious to know what you think.
…please excuse me, I’ve got to check the mail.
Filed under: Uncategorized , amateur psychology, emotions, soapbox
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